I didn’t post yesterday because The Creepy One took a day off. I didn’t think that was allowed. Anyway, I didn’t get my eighteen hours of sleep because he kept waking me all throughout the day. Doesn’t he know how irritating that is? But I forgave him in the spirit of the season, by which I mean I’ll make him pay. And after I let him sleep in to 4 AM too – the man is such an ingrate!
I’m guessing yesterday was Christmas based on all the extra special food. As I understand things, once there was a man who had some really good ideas and as a reward he was nailed to two pieces of wood. After he was murdered, many religions sprang up to worship him, most notably during winter when they send out the guy out in red whose name is an anagram of “Satan” and a misspelling of “Claws”. His job is to judge people and reward those he deems worthy. Apparently, I have been very good indeed, and if that’s all it takes to get me more food, I say nail some more people to trees. This world needs more organized religion.
Other than lots of food and petting, I was given two new scratching posts, although TCO likes to call them a treadmill and his carpet. His carpet? He’s forgetting the pecking order around here. I awoke him at 2 AM today to remind him of who’s in charge. Unfortunately he’s taken to sleeping completely under the covers so my licking and poking is having no effect. I found an exposed elbow and tried extending one claw to lightly scratch him awake but only succeeded in getting hooked on his blanket, which forced him to get up and disentangle me.
As they say, there’s more than one way to skin a human. I only hope my new owner is more sensitive to my needs.
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4 comments:
Oh, man, Chian! You usually let me sleep all night if I am around all day to hang with you...I think you love the creepy one more than me if you're trying to play with him all night long. And how on earth can you scratch that treadmill? Carpet, ok, I could see you doing that (esp if some of the catnip from the scratching board fell onto the floor), even though you don't do that at home. I mean, it's a nubby fabric. But the TREADMILL??? What the heck is there to scratch on that muther?
Chian, please let poor TCO sleep a little more. If you kill him through lack of sleep, there will be no one left to feed you. It seems like a good thing for you that TCO isn't as mean as me...I would have used the water pistol on you by now!
Kira, Chian is obviously scratching up the treadmill when he's running laps, honey. :)
Kira - the rubber conveyor belt is great for scratching. My claws get great purchase.
Mad - shh - don't tell him about the water pistol. I think he's forgotten it.
Joe - not true. I'm still trying to regain all the wonderfull blubber I lost when she had me nuked. Exercise is the last thing I need.
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