Last night The Creepy One watched 2LDK while I sat at his feet and dozed. The movie was about two creatures that inhabited the same apartment whose mannerisms conflicted. They addressed this by getting on each others’ nerves and escalating matters until eventually everything was resolved and both got lots of food and affection. At least I’m assuming that’s how it ended – I fell asleep, but that’s how all situations in my life are resolved.
With that movie as my inspiration, I awoke at 3:00 AM to find a rival cat on MY patio. We engaged in a quick rendition of Dueling Fire Engines, which prompted TCO to get out of bed and chase the interloper away. 3A is a tad early to start the day, but I managed to get in a good twenty-three hours of sleep the day before, so I managed after a snort of catnip.
I had been feeling better, largely thanks to plenty of fresh, cold air, but TCO shut the glass door to my patio after the caterwauling incident. Over the next hour and a half I reminded him that I deserved to be loved every fifteen to twenty minutes, but I felt increasingly queasy as the apartment warmed. I rewarded TCO’s pampering by barfing on his carpet twice and, as long as he was up to get some cleaning products, I demanded my morning food. I didn’t get it. We need to work on that. At least I got the glass door opened again.
Despite my continuous gentle prodding*, he refused to get out of bed and feed me until 7:30. After eating my morning treat, I tracked him to the bathroom and found him standing on MY kitty rug. I countered by climbing the toilet and standing over the sink while he tried to scrape the hair from his face. I don’t know why people do that – it’s just perverted.
The battle is joined – all hail the kitty! Also feed and pet me.
* He tries to sleep through my mewling, so I developed a technique wherein I extend one paw, claws retracted, and lean forward with my body weight to nudge. I think the humans call it “poking”.
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3 comments:
Hmmm. You're doing GREAT work keeping up Grant, Chian! You must be so proud! However, I have to warn you that I already told him that if he gives you food before the 7a mark, then he'll have to repeat it every single night or else you'll go nuts. So, he's on to that technique.
Did you win the battle with the other cat? How did it get onto YOUR porch? I bet if you asked nicely, Grant would put up an electric fence outside the fence. Anything that leads to death and destruction he seems to enjoy.
You should be warned, however, that if you continue to keep him up all night like that, he'll never offer to take care of you again, and you'll have to be boarded! Be careful!
This blog is much more interesting than most human blogs. You go, kitty!
Kira - the other cat was much thinnner than me and had no problem slipping between the slats to escape. And you seem to enjoy it when I keep you awake, so I assume all humans are exactly the same. But I still prefer you.
NWJR - the Internet needs more cats. We rule!
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